Yesterday I had a good life, hanging out with friends, singing hymns and playing Settlers of Catan, but last night I came back to Boston to discover my darling computer, Fatimah, who I missed so much, decided to turn into a brain dead idiot in my absence. It's so sad, my friends. I can't help but feel that if I'd brought her with me this wouldn't have happened. And of course the only thing on it that I didn't save is my personal statement necessary for all of my grad school applications. I hate my life and I want to die.
Now I could just retype the essay, but it's more fun to be melodramatic. Oh, and if you have the slightest idea that you might be feeling depressed the following day don't stay up late reading Shopgirl. This morning I woke up and felt all empty and frightened and decided I didn't want to do anything for the rest of my life because it would all be horrible anyway. Sorry, it's not that I didn't like the book, it's just that I . . . it affected me negatively. But now I am listening to one of the best mixes to come out of Fifth North--Emily Elliot Barfhead's "Songs for the Saddest Days." As Dr. Hesselink would say, "hmmm."
I had the greatest Thanksgiving. One good thing about being out of college--considerably less sexual tension. Ah, Covenant College. But it was great to see friends graduated and un-, along with my dear brother, and to enjoy paper games and board games and good fellowship. Evan, who was there, put it well. Yes, thanksgiving, and pray for my computer, because it is like a part of myself. And pray for me, as I try to get this grad school stuff finished up this week so I can stop feeling like my life means nothing (but, please, no pity).
Posted by linnea at November 28, 2005 10:42 PMgeez. I just want to fricken hug you. I am going to call tonight. I want to hear more about your weekend, and now shopgirl, since I told you to read it and all.
Posted by: Natalie at November 29, 2005 8:04 PM